Michael told us that children were the only reason worth living for. Why didn’t we listen?

This post has turned into a diary as each day new comments had to be added here from another post.

December 19, 2012.  ALFRED KINSEY’S LEGACY

Don’t you worry child?

Guys, I must confess to you that I am going through a terrible crisis.

It  started with all the injustice towards Michael Jackson from the media and the public, and their hypocrisy in harassing an innocent man while overlooking the problem of real child abuse.

LEAVE THE KIDS ALONE report Those who contributed to it

This was followed by the Pennsylvania University report about sexual exploitation of children in North America which I partially retyped swallowing tears on the way. It turns out that children are abused on a mass scale and mostly in families – by relatives and those whom children know and not by strangers as everyone thinks. The abused minors run away from homes and form an army of street children who have to sell sex for survival. They flock to sun-and-sand cities where really “big bucks” are.  Many respected fathers of families go there as conventioneers and pay for sex with the young (the younger the child is, the higher fee is). Then they happily return home and raise their own children. The “sun and sand” cities are Los Angeles, San Francisco and the like.

Incidentally, the California state which has a life-long tradition of persecuting Michael Jackson for no reason at all, is also a place with the highest rate of commercial sexual exploitation of children in the US. To me it looks like an explanation why they chose to harass Michael Jackson at all – behind the smokescreen of a “fight” against Michael’s imaginary “crimes” it was much easier to hide real and mass sexual abuse of children blossoming in California on an incredibly large scale.

LEAVE THE KIDS ALONE Page 2 of those who contributed to the report (click to enlarge)

I personally would call the Pennsylvania University eye-opening and shattering report a Leave The Kids Alone scream, though officially it carries a rather calm title The Commercial Sexual Exploitation of Children In The U.S., Canada and Mexico. The report was made in 2001/2002 by the university sociology professors  on the basis of extensive information from the FBI and other knowledgeable sources. For the parties involved in the study see the two lists on the right please.

The link to the Pennsylvania University report is here : http://es.scribd.com/doc/78886345/The-Commercial-Sexual-Exploitation-of-Children-In-the-U-S-Canada-and-Mexico-Complete-CSEC-020220  If you want to know the scope of real child abuse and its specifics in the US these days the information it contains will be simply invaluable to you.

Mad sexologist Alfred Kinsey is showing children a documentary about animals engaged in sex…

It just happened that this report was followed by a talk  in the comments section about a mad revolutionary professor Alfred Kinsey and his mad effect on the Western society. The two are closely interconnected as Kinsey’s madness began sometime in the 1950s , and its results and effect are illustrated by the Pennsylvania University report made fifty years later.

… and here are the frightened and disturbed faces of children watching it (from “The Kinsey Syndrome”)

A lot can be said about this pervert and pseudo-scientist, however I will limit myself to a link to a very serious documentary about Alfred Kinsey called The Kinsey Syndrome. Among other things you will learn that for his “studies” Kinsey was using the services of pedophiles, did not give them in and was sort of encouraging them in their practices…

A couple of shots from the documentary are provided on the left and right here.  Looking at them you will probably wonder why Kinsey wasn’t handcuffed then and there and why he is honored now as one of the greatest authorities in science. I also wondered what they would have done to Michael Jackson if he had been guilty of just a little bit of what Kinsey did. And after that some people are not paying attention to how sham the campaign against Michael was!

By false allegations against the innocent Michael Jackson they were simply distracting attention from the grave sexualization of children and real erosion of society done on a mass scale behind everyone’s back!  While the media and prosecution didn’t know what else to invent about Jackson, all those dirty deeds of a huge academic pedophilia  lobby thriving now were right here, under everyone’s nose – only no one noticed as they were looking in the direction of a totally innocent man.  There can be no doubt that this was actually the whole idea of the campaign  from the very start of it…

Here is a link to the documentary about Alfred Kinsey – http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=D81T4fe8qME&NR=1  After watching it the alleged Michael Jackson’s tickling of Jason Francia “on two occasions on the outside of his clothes” would look to you as a mere (and incredible) joke – even if those “two occasions” had been true (which they are not).

Watch the documentary. And then compare Michael Jackson and Alfred Kinsey and what was done to one and wasn’t done to the other, and it is this comparison which will boggle your mind.

It happened so that after a talk about Kinsey came a massacre at a Connecticut school arranged by a quiet and clever young guy who smashed his computer first and then started  killing for some reason. He had difficulties with adaptation to the society but was otherwise harmless or at least looked so. His mother possessed 5 guns and had a hobby of shooting in her free time instead of trying to adapt her son to life. This resulted in her own death and the death of 26 other innocent victims, 20 of whom were young children.

Some paper says that she  took her son out of school as she protested to the plans the authorities had for him, but no one explains what these plans were and why he was homeschooled though he was bright enough for a college. The media does not try to analyze the inner, psychological reasons why all this happened except that they talk about the evil of guns, which is so obvious that it is even unnecessary to discuss.

Vika  lives in an orphanage. She was born in November 2000

Then the child theme was picked up by our glorious Russian  institution which calls itself parliament. This institution has now approved a law not allowing adoption of Russian children by the US people and despite my attitude towards our authorities, after reading about Kinsey’s legacy for the US it is the first time that I am at a loss and terribly hesitant.  Adopted children do indeed die one after another after horrendous beatings and sexual abuse  in some US families (see here:  http://poundpuplegacy.org/node/46524) and what abuse goes unreported only God knows.

On the other hand I’ve looked up our statistics and found that Russian children die from the hands of their biological parents at the rate of 1800 a year.  This was quite a shock to me.  I knew that drinking mothers often abandon their children and they are raised in orphanages, but I didn’t know of the deaths and so many of them… Our general opinion  has always been that orphans, especially those with a troubled past and an array of hereditary diseases, are better off if taken abroad – over there they will receive better medical treatment and good care. But after learning of all that sexual abuse and deaths of adopted children these benefits I am no longer convinced of.  At least in their orphanages these children were alive.

And when all of the above was followed by information about four children including a newborn baby taken away from a caring Russian mother living in Finland and married to a Finn my nerves were completely shattered into pieces. It seems that the elder girl said at school that the father had slapped her on her back with his hand and as a result of that all four children were taken away from their mother in accordance with European norms.

Michael would have understood …[MJ is attending the funeral of an AIDS victim Ryan White]

In other words life has suddenly focused on one single problem – children and what we so carelessly do to them, and I cannot think of anything else, even MJ.

Though Michael would have surely understood and would have probably felt in the same way. He always knew that all children are our common children, that their problems are our common problems and that there can be nothing more important than children in our lives…

I have no solutions. All I can say is that all these problems are simply impossible to bear any longer – all this child abuse is impossible, all these politics are impossible, all these innocent deaths are impossible, all this human cruelty, lack of understanding, lies, hypocrisy, madness and inability to find a proper way out – all this is simply impossible to live with.

Can’t we do something about it?

December 20, 2012.  ADOPTION

Wonderful American parents…

Today I’ve spent half a day looking for information on adoption of children by Americans and found very many good and happy stories. This is what we actually always thought and expected which is why our people were always happy when children were adopted abroad.

… for three Russian girls

Here are some of these stories. These three girls were exceptionally lucky – their American parents are kind, loving and wonderful in every way!
http://www.dontforgetthechildren.com/?p=166

The pictures of adopted children show that all of them gradually become more adjusted, happy and normal when taken into families – even those who initially had some dysfunctions:

http://englishrussia.com/2007/12/19/adopted-russian-kids/

“Maybe Russia could have asked for better prior adoption screening and follow up instead of stopping adoption all together.”

This is what I was told in the comment. My spontaneous reply was – please do not confuse the Russian people with our authorities and don’t throw all of us into one pile. I shudder when someone on the top takes decisions for us and this is regarded as “Russia’s” decisions. Nothing can be further from the truth – we are two different worlds apart living lives of our own, the authorities live theirs, while we live ours with a huge gap in between. The people have no opportunity to influence the decisions taken by President or by our “parliament” (which no one elected as the elections were sham). This was what actually all recent rallies were all about.

The ban on the adoption had a pre-history. First the US looked into the death of a man who died while kept in detention and took a decision not to allow the officials connected with his wrongful death to enter the US (rightfully so, in my opinion). Then our authorities retaliated by forbidding the adoption of Russian kids. One clearly has nothing to do with the other and they used it just as a pretext.

Before and after adoption into a family

On the other hand I do not rule out that some of parliamentaries may be genuinely concerned. The problem is that there were 19 horrendous deaths of our children in the US, as well as cases of their sexual abuse or neglect (like an adoptive parent returning one boy by plane saying she no longer wanted him). If there had been no such statistics there would have been no pretext either, and without the pretext they wouldn’t have taken such a decision.

But they had this pretext. In fact the number of deaths among adopted children amounts to the number of child victims in a recent shooting by Lanza. So by their cruelty to children some adoptive parents put a stop to a good process which normal people from both sides only welcomed. Their neglect and callousness were used in big politics, enabling hate to win over love in the long run.

December 21, 2012. DANGERS AND HOPES

This was the text I wrote as a reply to Rodrigo’s comment on another post:

“The evil and injustice is unbearable, Helena. But me, you, and other’s out there who are fighting the same fight CANNOT afford to fall apart. It’s easier said than done. We’ve both experienced the evil and injustice on a grand scale, greater than what we started with.” – Rodrigo

I am not falling apart – every crisis after the initial turmoil brings about better understanding of things and sometimes even helps to make a leap forward.

Michael’s death in 2009 also brought about a huge crisis in my life – it was a shock to realize the terrible injustice done to an exceptionally pure, innocent and harmless person whose only desire was to do good to the world. And see what we did to him in return… Three years of non-stop investigation has made me more than sure that Michael Jackson was completely innocent. You can believe me that I can write a hundred more new posts to prove this point and shatter every remaining allegation into pieces.

But suddenly a new crisis came along – research of all the circumstances around Michael Jackson opened up a terrible picture of at least two more processes taking place now. The first process is a totally despicable behavior of profit-seeking, hypocritical media which creates a smokescreen of “fight against pedophilia” by continuing to degrade innocent Michael (but totally ignoring the real problem) and the hordes of lazy and ignorant people believing these lies and not moving their little finger to learn a little truth.

“The poor paedophile… had his reputation destroyed…finally quite corresponding with us“, says Paul Gebhard who replaced Alfred Kinsey as a director of Kinsey Institute (a shot from The Kinsey Syndrome documentary)

And the second process is the erosion of basic morals of the society by real pedophiles and a powerful academic lobby who are very successful in sexualization children and are working hard to bring down the last barriers to pedophilia the world over with the help of pseudo-scientists like Alfred Kinsey, author of “sex revolution” in the 60s, and thousands of his followers.

“Incest between adults and younger children can… prove to be a satisfying and enriching experience”. This is a quote from a book by Waldren Pomeroy, another Kinsey’s associate. He was the first Dean of the degree-granting Institute for Advanced Study of Human Sexuality in San Francisco. Masters Degrees are offered in Human Sexuality, Public Health in Human Sexuality, Education and Doctor of Philosophy degrees with a focus in sexology and erotology. They also offer professional certificates in Sex Education, Clinical Sexology, Sexological Bodywork, Sexological Instructor/Advisor of AIDS/STI Prevention, Sex Coaching, Sexological Hypnotism, and Erotology Certificates. These Waldren Pomeroy’s followers teach children in US schools.

The Pennsylvania University report of 2001/02 mentioned above shows that pedophilia is spreading like the plague after Kinsey sowed the first seeds and his followers promoted his perverse ideas contaminating every sphere of the society.

Now we are reaping the rotten fruit of what they did in the form of numerous Saviles, Sanduskys and thousands of ordinary family men who are not above some occasional sex with underage children if such services are offered on the “market”.

For information about it please see the section of Pennsylvania University report on the so-called “transient” males including members of the military, truck drivers, seasonal workers, conventioneers, sex tourists and “opportunistic” exploiters (i.e., personas who will sexually abuse whoever is available for sex including children) and the scale of the problem.

I will post some pieces from that report one day and they will show to you (same as they did to me) that most of child-abuse cases take place within families, which is why children run away from homes and then their life goes further downhill with drugs, survival sex and diseases also getting into the picture. When they find themselves in the street various “opportunistic” exploiters use these children for their pleasure – however the starting point for ruining these young lives is still in the families, and very often in quite prosperous ones too.

Though the prospect of being abused in an adoptive family may be real, a no better situation is created when thousands of children are kept in child-care centers and have never known a family life at all. So adoption still remain the only way out for these children and a chance to provide a better future for a child. Even if the children are physically healthy all orphans are still traumatized by not having parents of their own. Many of them had a disastrous past and the forced need to live the first 18 years of their life in various state institutions doesn’t make things much better.

So when we choose between an (adoptive) family which sometimes may be a risk to a child and similar dangers faced by the kid in child-care centers, we find ourselves between Scilla and Charybdis where every wrong move may result in a huge damage to a child – placing the kid in a wrong family may do enormous harm and leaving the kid in a special institution forever will surely do harm too.

Even if the child lives in a model child-care center and is very well taken care of there, at the age of 18 all of them have to go out into life which is like open sea to them – they feel helpless in most ordinary circumstances as they have never lived alone.  As a result 10% commit suicide, 40% become addicted to drugs or alcohol, 40% end up in prison, and only 10% find their place in life.

The situation inside orphanages is slowly getting better, but even if the child avoids the dangers of harm, cruelty and abuse within the state walls, the biggest problem of these children is their further adaptation to society. When they leave their state institutions, which was the only home they ever had, they feel all alone, have little money, and no social skills whatsoever. They don’t know how to handle even the little money they have, as they have never paid for food, clothes, or utilities on their own. They are fearful of others but being essentially helpless, they become easy prey to all sort of crooks who know how to win their trust. These predators cheat them out of the housing provided to them by the state, and many of the graduates of child-care institutions soon end up homeless as a result. It was with great joy that I learned that all graduates of such child-care centers in Moscow are provided with flats when they reach the age of 18, but the terrible news is that many of them are unable to keep the flats to themselves as they get easily cheated out of them – a flat is a big asset here.

In the provincial areas housing is a much bigger problem due to scarce financing and children have to wait long until they are provided with a corner of their own. Some are allotted a room in a flat shared with another graduate, and sometimes it is a total stranger, and who knows what this neighbor may turn out to be?

Up till now the adoption of these children by Russians accounted for two thirds of the whole number, while foreigners accounted for at least one third (if not more) and most of the adoptive parents were Americans. Now that our authorities have banned adoption of Russian children by the US the chances that these children will ever have a family and a stable future have greatly diminished, alas. The chance is left for all the others though and it will be horrible if this chance is lost, in my opinion. Our authorities can close this channel at any time now.

Vika: “If someone adopts me I hope it will be a good family. I hope we will go to the sea in summer…”

I’ve spent several past days on adoption sites and it is with much trepidation, fear, doubt, but also hope that I will provide to you videos of children who in 5 or 6 years from now will leave the child-care centers and will find themselves facing our social environment which is not easy to survive in, especially for them.

But given that at least some of those who closely monitor this blog may be pedophiles, making such a step on my part may be very reckless.

So let me address only those of you whom I trust and know to be good and reliable people from my correspondence with you over Michael Jackson’s issues – please make enquiries among your relatives, friends, colleagues and neighbors who are trustworthy people, and ask them if they want to adopt a young teenager in order to give the kid family warmth and a stable future. If there is such a desire and these people are ready for the difficulties this decision will surely involve I am ready to help them in communicating with the necessary authorities.

At the moment I will translate only one video. The girl seems to me a complete blessing:

Vika (full name Victoria): My name is Vika, I am eleven years old.

Voiceover: Vika is a born actress. When she is on stage in school performances she behaves absolutely natural and doesn’t feel self-conscious. On the contrary she opens up there and shows all her talents in full.

Vika at 0:20: This is a mouse made of seed beeds. I made it last Monday.

Voiceover: Vika sings in a melodic voice, and has a good ear always hitting the right note. When she dances she gracefully repeats the dance moves she has learned. In short she surely has a talent for performing.
Vika is a gentle and open child. When she is on duty in class she performs her chores well. She tidies up her bed each morning and accurately puts her clothes on hangers. She is very responsive to tenderness, thanks you for each word of encouragement and gives you her tenderness back.
She also has a very valuable quality, worthy of respect. When she sees some injustice, Vika will not complain or report to anyone, but if you ask her about what happened, she will not be afraid to tell the truth. You may be sure that she will say everything as it really was without any exaggeration or unfairness. This is a very honest girl who sincerely hopes that her mother and father will soon come and take her into their family.

Vika at 1:11 “If I am adopted, I hope that my family will be good, and that during school holidays we will travel, and in summer go to the beach, to the sea or some other country. And I dream that my family will be the best”.

* * *

There are many children like that. The thought of this girl spending six more years in a cold state child-care institution and sailing in the open sea all alone after that makes me take this unprecedented move.

This is the first time I am doing anything of the kind and am shaking like a schoolgirl myself.

I have no idea what past troubles this girl went through and what future difficulties might be awaiting her future parents, but the feeling that this cannot be left as it is does not give  me any quiet either.

Let us do something about it. And may the Almighty help us.

December 22, 2012. UNDERSTANDING MICHAEL

Rodrigo sent the following comment which had to be moved here as it found itself in the wrong post again:

“Looking at that video. We sit here, hoping for this and that that for Christmas, and all that little girl wants is a loving family, which is unlikely to happen for her on December 25th. My heart aches for her.”

Yes, these children spend their whole lives dreaming of a better future, and when it never comes they eventually break down or get cold, unfeeling and even brutal. Now that I’ve read much more about their situation I’m amazed to find many points of similarity between their problems and the problems Michael Jackson faced as a child and then in adult life.

It turns out that even if these children live in more or less satisfactory conditions – are fed, clothed, schooled, entertained, medically taken care of and are even given numerous gifts by kind visitors and benefactors – the first thing they greatly suffer of is deprivation of an individual loving parent. There are many people around them, some are better, some are worse, but they desperately long for being singled out of the mass and be unique to someone. If they see warmth from someone they can form attachments for this person as if for a real mother/father, and it isn’t necessarily their ‘official’ caretaker, but may be anyone – a cleaning woman, or even a volunteer who comes only on occasions but singles out this child with special warmth.

Michael suffered from parental deprivation very much indeed.

“If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything that happens in between can be dealt with.”

Most of the time he was away from home travelling with his brothers and father. Joe Jackson can be struck off as a parent and the fact that this cruel beast was a father to these children only makes things worse – children expect more of a father than of a care-taker in an orphanage who receives money for the job. And the mother in Michael’s life was a sort of a distant fairy who was somewhere in his dreams and recollections, but was mostly absent as they travelled while she stayed at home with the girls. The only person with whom Michael could more or less form a unique relationship was his Jewish teacher Rose who accompanied them everywhere on tours.

Michael was the youngest and needed such a unique relationship most and happily he had at least Rose. From what Michael said about her to Rabbi Shmuley she was strict but seemed to be a loving person and this probably saved Michael.

It’s only when I started reading about our orphans that I began to understand Michael’s real problems.

Children in orphanages are never left alone to themselves – they are always together in a group, they have meals in a group, attend school in a group, have numerous activities in a group, go on excursions or for a walk in a group. In fact everything is done in a group and they are not allowed to even go to their room and stay there by themselves. They are never left alone and are never given a single minute of privacy. This total deprivation of privacy is not done on purpose – this is simply how it is organized as this way it is easier to keep an eye on them. This brings much discipline and regularity into their lives but makes them terribly dependent on others.

And when they leave the orphanage they, in full contrast to all their past life, suddenly find themselves totally free. This is when their real problems start. They never had any spare time in their whole life, and have never been alone and now all of a sudden they have all the freedom in the world and no one beside them. They don’t know what to do with their freedom and have no one to rely on or give advice.

They don’t know the most basic things about individual form of living and are so disadapted that they don’t know how to use a refrigerator – in their orphanages there are no refrigerators, all food was brought from elsewhere or was cooked by the staff, so that the children had no food of their own and no money to buy it for anyway.

They don’t know how to use the little money they have as they never paid for anything themselves – everything was provided for, and at some point they begin thinking that this is the only way it can ever be at all. When they receive their first money they spend it within the first three days on totally unnecessary things with nothing left for food. They don’t even know how to clean their flat because in their orphanage this was done by cleaners and they grow up thinking that this should be done only by those who receive money for it…

In short at the age of 20 they behave almost like 12-year olds, who are also demanding and unhappy. This is what social disadaptation is all about.

By the way since they are unable to live and function on their own, they often get together again, living in one flat while the rest of the flats are rented out – and again the same pattern of “group living” is reproduced. They don’t form families as a result, are unable to work but have all free time in the world with all its negative consequences.

Michael’s childhood may look different only at first sight while in reality it wasn’t that much different.

MJ: There were times when I had great times with my brothers, pillow fights and things, but I was, used to always cry from loneliness.

The only thing you can deduct from Michael’s childhood is overprotection, but all the rest of it was there – harsh and even cruel discipline, no spare time, no privacy, the need to always stay in a group of his siblings and never having a chance to be on his own, constant rehearsing, working, travelling. No contacts with anyone else and no other activities except those on stage and not in the best social environment too considering that they had to perform even in sex clubs.

In short it is the same type of life resembling you of living in a cage with total social disadaptation and disorientation as a result. And only attending the religious services and associating with normal people there formed a sort of a counterbalance to everything else.

Michael was used to work and this helped him out a lot, but the rest of it was there – even his attempts to reproduce a “group style” of living with the help of his friends and their children who gave him a feeling of a “family” around him. After living in a crowd for so many years he surrounded himself with mannequins to recreate the illusion of people around him thus restoring the only type of social interaction he actually knew, with lots of people around but no one having any special attachment for him. These were the only family and other relations he had and since he never saw anything else it was extremely difficult for him to form a family of his own.

MJ: . . . I never did birthdays or Christmases – or sleepovers or none of that simple, fun stuff [in my childhood]. Or going into a shopping market and just grabbing something off the counter, you know all those simple things like going out in society and being normal. That’s why when I befriend people it’s usually not the celebrities, it’s usually the simple normal family somewhere. I want to know what their life is like. That’s why I went to that hut in China or going to some of the mud houses in South America. I want to know what it is like. I have slept in crazy places where people say. “Are you nuts?” And I say, “No. I want to know what it’s like.”

Children like that require social rehabilitation and special corrective methods to teach them how to function in a society and acquire its simplest patterns of behavior. This is why Michael was so much longing to see what family life is like and often stayed in other people’s houses. He never had it and wanted to learn how to.

This is also how they are trying to rehabilitate our orphans now – by placing them in families before it is too late and before they get totally disadapted, otherwise they will need many years of post-orphanage monitoring and assistance. The state system saved these children from the street where they found themselves in the difficult 90s but created new problems, which now show that only the family pattern works.

The family is the crux of this whole matter.

Michael was forced to follow the pattern of life of our social orphans almost to the letter of it – first he was subjected to parent deprivation and harsh discipline in a group, and later he had to close himself up in almost full isolation due to the mass adoration and hysteria around him. And I am not even talking about his illnesses like vitiligo, lupus and a burn which only add to the feeling of isolation which even the best socially adapted person will develop in such circumstances.

As a result of all that Michael was not socially adapted at all. Add to it some racial problems too and you have soooooooo much of everything that I cannot believe how Michael managed to turn into a pure, kind and humane man he was.

December 23, 2012. AN ORPHAN IN THE ADULT WORLD

“I agree very much with your perceptive assessment of Michael’s childhood, namely, his “parental deprivation”. As you say, his tutor Rose was the only supportive, nurturing presence to accompany him on his numerous tours. No wonder he came to love reading and learning. Incidentally, reading IS something you do alone, and I have no doubt it was an escape for him from a demanding, lonely world, as well as a way to be alone and to enrich his mind and knowledge.” – aldebaranredstar

Aldebaran, when Michael was speaking about his childhood and even wrote a song about it, I could not really understand what he was trying to say. I think this condition is actually very difficult to describe, especially for a child who doesn’t understand himself what happened to him and cannot explain. And this makes it all the more difficult for us to understand what he is trying to communicate.

It was only when reading some perceptive psychological analyses about how children deprived of their parents feel in orphanages and what problems they face upon graduation that some light began to dim at the end of this tunnel. And it was then that some similarities with Michael suddenly sprang to my eye.

So many things began to fit in, and in addition to everything already mentioned even some contradictions in Michael’s character suddenly received an explanation. For example, after many years of living alone in the world of adults (and similar children) orphans develop severe contrasts in their character – they are vulnerable, frightened like hell, but always defend themselves by a don’t-meddle-with-me mask thus combining at least two personalities in one.

They can also be both shrewd and intelligent,  but behave like helpless infants having no clue about the most common and easiest things (how to use a refrigerator, as I’ve already said). I recall that Michael derived exceptional joy from learning how to use a vacuum cleaner and showed it with pride to someone who visited him in a rehab in 1993. That person was embarassed when he saw how proud Michael was of his ‘achievement’. However there was nothing to be embarassed about – in terms of social skills Michael’s vagabond hotel lifestyle with forced isolation from the outside world was no better than a life in prison.

Orphans living among adults form their own skills for survival but these skills have nothing to do with the skills of children entering the same life from normal families (even unhappy ones). They are half kids and half old people. They are savvy in some matters of adult life (Michael could make contracts when he was young) but if they have money they will be mad about toys and spend money on them without thinking whether they have enough for tomorrow’s food. Their relations with money are also very peculiar – they are both money-saving and spendthrift.

I recalled Michael’s words: “I was a veteran before I was a teenager” and realized that all these children are veterans before they are teenagers – they have gone through and seen so much by their teens that under normal circumstances a rare adult goes through anything like that. Judging them by the merits of our world is the biggest mistake we can make – and this is what the media and the public have always done in respect of Michael Jackson.

[MJ is doing shopping with his nephews].                MJ: You feel like a prisoner and you feel like you are going to die. And that’s it. I am walking and I would just go walking down the street and traffic would get backed up and people would be taking pictures. I knew I looked sad and some people would come up and talk, and they would go. -”What are you doing?” I’d go, “I am walking.” They’d go, “Why are you walking? Where are all the guards?” I said. “I don’t feel like all that. I just want to walk and I am looking for someone to talk to me.” So they would talk to me. I’ve done that many times. I’d ask people to be my friend and they’d say. “Sure.” It’s true. I’d go to the parks. Then I realized that that could be dangerous too, but I was hurting that much.
SB: Were they intimidated when you asked them to be your friend? Did they say, “I can’t be your friend. . . you are Michael Jackson?”
MJ: I would even ask for their phone numbers. [From Rabbi Shmuley’s tapes]

Now that I’ve read just a little bit about the world of orphans Michael’s desire to always have a substitute family by his side and preferably children (of whom he was less afraid and whom he understood best) becomes really understandable to me.

To understand that it is just enough to know that they group together upon graduation in one flat again searching for psychological security, comfort and survival.

One of their innumerable problems is that they crave for privacy which they never had, but at the same time cannot live alone in principle if no one took care to socially adapt them.

Some American parents laughingly write about their children adopted from Russian orphanages that they cannot sleep alone in rooms with their doors shut – the doors should always be open. After reading things like that Michael’s request to Dr. Klein that his whole staff should sleep in his room when they accompanied him on a tour (to enable him to sleep) does not surprise me in the least any more.

Michael wasn’t ‘weird’ – he was just an orphan who had to live alone among adults in the adult world.

After making this discovery I feel like we have never really known Michael (and this after three years of our research!)  and have to start it all over again, this time from a totally new perspective.